Funny Status Ideas

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives.

Every vagina needs a 'clear history' app

thinks it would be fun to to go to Walmart, get a football helmet, snorkel and a foam noodle, hop on a toddler bike, and joust! who's with me?????

Did anyone else notice Rebecca Black doesn’t have to pee in the mornings?

My husband is serenading my bestie with a child sized princess guitar. Wow!

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don’t point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

if i had a sex change and got with a guy, would that make me gay?