Funny Status Ideas

Facebook asks what I’m thinking. Twitter asks what I’m doing. Foursquare asks where I am. The internet has turned into a crazy girlfriend.

Every time a sexy woman jumps out of a giant cake there is at least one guy who is bummed about the cake being ruined.

Friend texted me and asked “what does IDK stand for?” I said “I dont know” she replied “OMG! nobody does!”

I can do this no sex thing forever if I have to

LD Welsh leader says she “regret[s] that some of those typos have managed to sneak…through” << just some? Which typos is she happy with?

Survey: how many of u Guys have had a Zipper to Genital accident in your lifetime.

She told me she eats fruit when she’s hungover because it has more water than water.