Funny Status Ideas

If you ask Lebron James for a dollar he'll give you 75 cents, but he never gives you the 4th quarter.

I can't understand why some people cry when chopping onions. Personally I find it better to not get emotionally attached .

I want to change my name on Facebook to "No One," so when I try to add people, it will say, "No One wants to be your friend."

Thorough research is the key to quality reporting. Read the ENTIRE Wikipedia article before writing your story.

I wish my grades would smoke weed so they could get higher.

Life is like a roller coaster.. Without its downs, there wouldn't be any ups & nobody likes a roller coaster that only stays on one level..

It's not hotter this year. It's just that you are fatter and there is more surface area for the sun to hit.