Funny Status Ideas

Thanks to the Statue of Liberty there's at least a dozen French dudes who's greatest life achievement was making a giant copper toenail.

Children are natural mimics who act like their parents, despite every effort to teach them good manners.

If Bilbo's parents had any sense of humor they would have named him Tea.

Sometimes I like to imagine the Grammar Police are real and they're chasing you with handcuffs and a fully-charged taser.

I'd tell my boss to go screw himself but he would probably just delegate that to me also.

You know you are getting old when your back goes out more than you do.

Nothing gets me closer to murder than pedestrians who are out pacing me while I sit in traffic.