Funny Status Ideas

When Vanna White dies her family will receive a lot of touching letters.

Relationships should never be more complicated than a secret handshake.

I know you're not a baby but it'd be weird to stroke your back while you cry saying "Aw, its gonna be alright full grown adult"

Sad to see Borders closing. It was a neat place to hang out before going home and buying books off Amazon.

I just figured out why I'm overweight! The shampoo I use in the shower that runs down my body says "For extra volume and body". I'm going to start using "Dawn" dish soap. It says " Dissolves fat that is otherwise difficult to remove".

The documentary on Edgar Allen Poe should be named "That's So Raven".

"Gettin' Jiggy With It" is my favorite hip-hop song about Irish folk dancing.