Funny Status Ideas

I leave the subject line blank on my e-mails because I know I can’t stay on topic.

They should change the name of "Disney Channel" to "Celebrity Pre-Rehab".

Any machine is a smoke machine if you just use it wrong enough.

The only other thing more popular than Facebook's "Like" button is MySpace's "Delete Account" button.

Dear clever comeback, could you come BEFORE the argument is over.

Coffee helps me do the stupid stuff people make me do all day and beer helps me forget the stupid stuff people made me do all day.

The great thing about having an American boyfriend is every time I make a spelling mistake I just tell him it's 'British English.'