Funny Status Ideas

Trust me, don't play Twister with someone who has a prosthetic leg, you'll never win.

Men are the best cooks Because with 2 eggs, 1 sausage, and a little bit of milk, they can fill a girl's tummy for 9 months.

Drag racing is just dudes running in dresses, right?

I'm convinced when squirrels run the road, nearly missing your car, it must be some kind of squirrel gang initiation.

"An eye for an eye" would make a world full of pirates.

Any convenience store that requires the customer to wear pants isn’t convenient at all.

Someone just told me that they enjoyed my biography but thought it was a little self centered.