WTF Statuses

I just discovered that I can power all my appliances with the perkiness of that girl in the Progressive Insurance commercials.
So I turned my phone onto “airplane mode” and threw it up into the air. Worst transformer ever!
no, actually having a cat is not “just like” having a kid. accidentally swearing at your cat won’t make it grow up to be a stripper.
My baby is for sale, mama needs a bigger vehicle ;-,,) check out my pics on my profile.
If a vampire is jewish do they still run from the cross or do u need a star of david???????
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don’t point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
Did anyone else notice Rebecca Black doesn’t have to pee in the mornings?
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