I went to Big Lots with a $100 gift card. They just handed me the keys to the store.
Cyberbilly
I got really drunk and had unprotected sex with the cashier at 7-Eleven last night. I Hope I don't catch Slurpees.
Novell
Might wake up early and go running but I also might win the lottery. The odds are about the same.
Cyberbilly
The Bachelor is the show that answers the question "How much wine do you have to drink until the guy making out with twenty different women seems like he'd make a good husband?"
Robert Zunick
What would I give the woman who has everything? Well, my phone number for a start.
Cyberbilly
I once overdosed on Viagra. My wife took it really hard.
You know you are desperate for an answer when you look at the second page of Google.