WTF Statuses

If life gives you melons, you probably have dyslexia.
It's funny how our childhood punishment is now our adulthood pleasure, Like taking naps...spankings
The Miss Universe Pageant is obviously rigged. The winner is always from Earth.
The three phases of love: 1. XOXO 2. XXX 3. EX
I wonder if I´ll ever be mature enough to use a stud finder without pointing it at myself and saying "there's one."
I always go the extra mile. The restraining order says I have to.
I always say, your laundry is never completely done, unless you do it in the nude. (Which probably explains the strange looks at the laundrymat this afternoon.)
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