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#833
I'd be calmer defusing a bomb after four Red Bulls than watching my parents use my laptop.
Funny
56
Insightful
11
WTF?
3
GTFO!
4
#834
I don’t think I have a problem!” is the only response to anyone suggesting you might have one.
Funny
5
Insightful
1
WTF?
7
GTFO!
6
#835
Fact: Heat makes objects expand. So there you have it, I'm not overweight, I'm just overheated.
Funny
43
Insightful
2
WTF?
2
GTFO!
14
#836
Do NFL players have "fantasy office worker leagues"?
Funny
33
Insightful
7
WTF?
5
GTFO!
5
#837
Believe me, I HATE littering. But I do it anyway because I might be providing a Hermit Crab his dream home.
Funny
17
Insightful
4
WTF?
3
GTFO!
3
#838
Sitting at a wake and really wishing I had taken ventriloquism lessons at some point in life.
Funny
33
Insightful
1
WTF?
4
GTFO!
10
#839
If you define "mad" as lacking reason and appearing somewhat deranged then yes, I have "mad" flirting skills.
Funny
33
Insightful
4
WTF?
3
GTFO!
7
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