Insightful Statuses

#17842
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Xyuppi
The only blizzard conditions I am interested in are from Dairy Queen.
#17843
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Xyuppi
Humans are 75% water, basically cucumbers with anxiety.
I replaced my rooster with a duck. Now I wake up at the quack of dawn.
I found $20 laying in the parking lot and thought to myself “What would Jesus do?” So, I turned it into wine.
#17846
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Xyuppi
The ICU is where you take someone that has been injured playing PeekaBoo
#17847
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Florida
Not saying I’m old, but… When I was in school, we made our parents ashtrays for Christmas
Is it just me or do you think there's something terribly wrong with YouTube playing a 30 second commercial from their sponsor before watching a How to operate a fire extinguisher during an emergency video?
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