If you never set it, you always have the excuse, "I overslept because the alarm didn't go off."
I regret nothing but mostly because I can't remember most of the stuff I should probably regret
I can't tell if I actually have free time, or if I'm just forgetting everything...
I admire the commitment of girls who paint their eyebrows on. How do you pick one facial expression for the whole day? What if you find a penny?
I don't take steroids because I never want to look like I'm capable of helping my friends move.
A teenager without earbuds is the modern day unicorn.
I finally found a diet plan that works! It's called 'The Cost of Food'.