Insightful Statuses

#3663
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Midnite Reign
With the advances of technology these days how come no one has invented a tampon that is like a turkey timer that just pops up when it's done?
Hey officer, why did you stop me? Just an hour ago, you said that you never wanted to see me again.
Hello Fire Department? Is this Mr. December? I'm stuck in a tree. I mean, Meow...
So what do women say when they're actually fine?
Exciting news: Duchess Kate has gone into labor; this marks the first time anyone in the Royal family has been connected to the word labor.
I don't understand why people get angry when someone breaks up with them by text. I used to break up with people by never talking to them again.
You don't realize how inappropriate your favorite TV show is until your mom comes in to watch it with you.
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