Got hammered last night but still had the good sense to take a cab home. The problem now is how am I going to return it without getting into trouble...
OK, I'm not an advertising specialist but seriously McDonald's, what the hell were you thinking?!? Somebody asked me the other day if I'd tried a McDonald's McWrap. I said "Why would I eat something called McCrap?!?"
People in movies act like they've never seen a movie.
Most days I feel like three kids stacked up on each other’s shoulders, covered by a huge coat, trying to pass as one of all these grown-ups.
Why do people say “nice to meet you” before I’ve even said anything? How do you know it’s nice to meet me? I’m a jerk.
Cris
Turbo Tax might just be the worst video game I've ever played.
Cris
I was going to start jogging today, but then I remembered that I own a car.