I'll never understand why cartoon pictures of the sun always depict it wearing sunglasses. What exactly would it be protecting its eyes from?
The definition of "lack of effort" would be the guy who named the orange
"Slow and steady wins the race." Unless it's one of those weird races that puts an emphasis on speed
Ford F-150 commercials make it seem as if hauling loads of crumbled boulders over mountainous terrain is a commonly-practiced thing.
Vodka mixes well with everything...except decisions.
I love how Vine lets me record 6-second videos. It’s perfect for making sex tapes.
My wife and I laugh at how competitive we are at things, but I laugh more.