I love a good political joke. Unless it gets elected...
If you need to rush somewhere, carry a fire extinguisher. Nobody will stop a person running with a fire extinguisher...
Up until now, I thought "twerking" was short for "networking." Needless to say, today's business lunch was awkward.
Why does 'beans' only mean secret when it's "Don't spill the beans?" Why can't I say I have a dirty little beans to tell you?
How many boxes of these Thin Mints do I need to eat before I start seeing results?
Of all the things I have lost in life I miss my mind the most
Cyberbilly
I have OCD and ADD. Which means everything has to be perfect, but not for very long.