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#2845
I wish I had Dora's mom and dad, they let that girl go everywhere.
Funny
249
Insightful
42
WTF?
63
GTFO!
57
#2846
I can't afford anti-depressants so I'm just drinking No More Tears shampoo.
Funny
135
Insightful
25
WTF?
63
GTFO!
64
#2847
People go to the bar hoping for 2 things...to get hammered or to get nailed.
Funny
94
Insightful
27
WTF?
41
GTFO!
65
#2848
It's always darkest before the dawn. So if you're going steal your neighbor's newspaper that's be the time to do it.
Funny
68
Insightful
17
WTF?
28
GTFO!
66
#2849
If you ever need anything, don't hesitate to ask. But please, never need anything.
Funny
102
Insightful
35
WTF?
32
GTFO!
65
#2850
My life is just a bunch of "it seemed like a good idea at the time"s strung together.
Funny
133
Insightful
49
WTF?
88
GTFO!
74
#2851
World peace? We can't even navigate a four way stop without wanting to murder each other in extremely painful ways
Funny
241
Insightful
53
WTF?
66
GTFO!
75
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