It's funny how our childhood punishment is now our adulthood pleasure, Like taking naps...spankings
The Miss Universe Pageant is obviously rigged. The winner is always from Earth.
The three phases of love: 1. XOXO 2. XXX 3. EX
When I die, I want to be cremated and put inside an Etch-a-Sketch.
I wonder if I´ll ever be mature enough to use a stud finder without pointing it at myself and saying "there's one."
I mixed Krazy Glue with my Prozac. Now it's just glue.
I always go the extra mile. The restraining order says I have to.