maxpowers
Cell phones ruined pushing people in the pool.
If you've had your name called over the PA system at a grocery store, you're now famous enough to compete on Dancing with the Stars.
The next person that steals my identity can f'ing keep it.
My money keeps unfollowing me.
Someone needs to open a bar named "The Gym".
Where do you think Noah kept the termites on his giant wooden boat?
Cool Hand Luke = Paul Newman. Cool hand, Luke = Mark Hamill