Xyuppi
Too bad you can’t get abs from laughing at your own jokes, because I would have an 8 pack.
Xyuppi
I'm convinced my electricity bill would disappear if my fridge had a window.
Xyuppi
The guy who named the "chimichanga" should be given more authority to name things.
Neighbors just kicked me out of their shower and called the cops. Some of these pokemon go instructions are confusing. A lot of grey area...
Cyberbilly
My doctor prescribed me some suppositories for my nausea. They’re not the best medicine in the world, but they’re right up there.
If I drop my food on a plane, and we change time zones at the same time, do I receive an additional hour to the 5 second rule?
Xyuppi
Text messaging is ruining my social skills. I’m way funnier when I have five minutes to think of some witty response than I am when you’re standing right in front of me