Give a man a gun and he can rob a bank, give a man a bank and he can rob the world.
The moment for calm and rational discussion has passed. Now is the time for senseless bickering.
Going to see my favorite gay shoe-maker. That fruit cobbler always makes me smile!
I have to return this anatomy book because its appendix is missing.
Until they create texts that self destruct in 5 seconds, I'd stay away from sexting if I were you.
My dog just broke a mirror. Poor bastard. Forty-nine years of bad luck.
How quickly my dad wants to leave the restaurant is a good indicator as to how poorly he just tipped the waitress.