Xyuppi
There would be a lot less people willing to run for public office if the losers were required to pick up all the lawn signs afterwards.
Cyberbilly
If I ever win the lottery and someone asks me for money I'm going to give them a dollar and say "Here. Go play the Lottery. That's what I did."
Xyuppi
I wish my car was fueled by my lack of desire to go to work.
Xyuppi
I'm still trying to get over the fact that oranges are pre-sliced by nature.
It's so hard being a single mom when you have no kids and are a male teenager.
Xyuppi
You never realize how weird your friends are until you start to describe them to someone else.
Xyuppi
When I die, I want a cellphone in my coffin...just in case