Funny Statuses

Money can't buy happiness, but somehow it's a lot better to cry in a Mercedes than it is to cry on a bike...
#3054
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Cyberbilly
Target. The Wal-mart for people who think they are too good to shop at Wal-mart.
Virginity is like a soapbubble, one prick and it is gone.
You think 7 years is bad for breaking a mirror? Try breaking a condom.
I think I was mistaken when my boss told me she liked to see me hard at work.
Your ex asking to be friends after a break up is like kidnappers asking you to "keep in touch" after letting you go.
#2547
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Michael Mendoza
I hate when I'm about to hug someone really sexy and then my face hits the mirror.
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