The best part of my morning is when my cat curls up in my lap and falls asleep. I really don't want it to end. Hence the duct tape.
I think we should start calling it "uncommon sense" for the sake of accuracy.
Husband tried to piss me off by telling me he slept with my best friend. I said "Great! Now she knows I lied about the amazing sex!"
Brenna Mullally
If you watch Jaws backwards it's about a shark that keeps barfing up people so that a beach can be opened.
You know a song's about to go downhill lyrically when they start counting for no apparent reason.
I love my DVR. Now I can whizz through the commercials instead of during them.
Looks like Walgreens is gonna be Christmas for Halloween.