Funny Statuses

Dropping a can of soda and sticking it back in the fridge all shaken up for the next person to open is not nearly as funny when you live by yourself.

Despite the amazing features of Clark Kent as Superman, I think his greatest superpower was to convince everyone around him that he wasn't superman simply by wearing glasses. Well,. either that or Metropolis was a really stupid town.

Sometimes, I try to act nonchalant, but underneath I am super chalant.

Getting out of bed in the morning always gave me a headache until I tried it feet first.

Compare to Victoria' secret, what Starbucks charges for a cup isn't that bad.

Of course everyone seems sexy in a nightclub. There's liquor and you can't hear them.

I just decorated my bedroom to look like my desk at work so I can fall sleep faster.