Funny Statuses

Kim Kardashian's marriage was shorter than the line of trick or treaters at Casey Anthony's house.
Whoever said, "You can't teach an old dog new tricks," hasn't met my dog. I told him to play dead and after five straight days he's still going strong.
Patient: The problem is that obesity runs in our family. Doctor: No, the problem is no one runs in your family.
Just sprayed a mosquito with mosquito repellant. Now he'll never have friends.
You never realize what you have till it's gone. Toilet paper is a good example.
Need an ark? I noah guy.
#3094
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Kyle Kestler
If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
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