Hey, wanna hear a joke about Nirvana? No? Nevermind.
Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
If the Pillsbury doughboy had Facebook, he would be overwhelmed with pokes.
If a mute kid swears does his mother wash his hands with soap?
My grandma got a disease from sharing needles. Just say no to knitting.
It's a good thing everyone always says "You only live once" otherwise we might kill ourselves like it's no big deal.
I refuse to eat any cured meats until I can find out what they were cured of.