Funny Statuses

If someone farts at a poker tournament, no one will ever know who did it.
#15779
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Xyuppi
My internet is so slow, it's just faster to drive to the Google headquarters and ask them in person.
Thanksgiving is an emotional holiday. People travel thousands of miles to be with people they see once per year. And then discover once a year is way too often.
For daylight savings, we should move the clocks forward an hour on Monday at 9 AM so that we lose an hour of work instead of sleep.
#16040
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Xyuppi
Make Monday More Fun: Unplug the copier at work and put a sign on it that says “Now Voice Activated!” Sit back and watch the magic unfold..
I said I was good at making decisions. I didn't say the decisions I made were good.
#16190
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Xyuppi
You don't truly know someone until you see how they react to their bag of chips getting stuck in a vending machine.
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