Lying about my age is easier now that I have trouble remembering what it is.
Novell
It’s getting warm out. I can finally get back to smacking people and blaming it on mosquitoes!
Robert Zunick
We all have that friend who acts innocent but understands all the dirty jokes.
Novell
“Do you have a charger?” is the new “Could I bum a cigarette?”
Novell
When I’m at a restaurant I like to ask the waiter, “What’s your most frequently photographed entree?
Cyberbilly
It's not difficult to tell crocodiles and alligators apart. One will see you in a while whereas the other will see you later.
Picking a checkout line at Walmart is the new Russian roulette.