Funny Statuses

Our phones fall, we panic. Our friends fall, we laugh.
It's so annoying when I'm about to take a great photo and somebody calls my camera.
Facebook would be perfect if it could de-friend your ex from all of your friends when the relationship ended.
Sometimes I miss being in a relationship, but then I look at my wallet and I feel alright again.
My nephew told me that a girl was yelling at him and he didn't even know what he did. Imagine, at 7, he is so ready to get married.
I don't know what's more depressing, a sign twirler who's lazy or a sign twirler who's really into it.
If adult diapers are called Depends, then baby diapers should be called Definitely.
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