You know it was a very crazy night when you wake up in your own bed but it's in a stranger's house.
Cyberbilly
Word for the day: Exhaustipated - Too tired to give a crap.
They really should just put the Pepto directly into the Mexican food.
"No, thanks. I'm a vegetarian." is my typical response when someone hands me their baby.
Amigo
I'm so in debt I could start my own government.
Amigo
Some people are like clouds. When they go away, it's a beautiful day.
When I hear someone say, "chicken pot pie," I get excited three times.