Through Facebook profile pictures I learned that many of the idiots I went to school with have morphed into a car.
Getting off the internet at night is often the hardest part of my day.
I just started dating a homeless girl and it's great! When I take her home, I can drop her off anywhere I want.
If at first you do succeed, try not to look too surprised.
Everyone please be courteous and set your cell phones to lebron mode, no ring
The other day I caught her snorting sweet n low... somebody told her it was diet coke
There's no b, c, d, f, g, h, j, k, l, n, o, p, q, r, s, u, v, w, x, y, or z in team either.