I see those penis enlargment pills are working, your're a bigger d*ck today than you were yesterday!
Cyberbilly
The early bird gets the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Dave Asten
Claustrophobia is the fear of closed spaces. For example: I am going to the liquor store and I'm scared that it's closed.
PMS is just girls ovary acting.
If I had a twin that was like 2 mins younger that me I would always say 'when I was your age' and proceed to tell the what I did 2 mins ago
There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast. ~Author Unknown
Some fairy tales begin with "Once upon a time..." Others begin with "If elected, I promise..."