As a kid you avoid swearing in front of adults. As an adult you avoid swearing in front of kids.
Xyuppi
It would be awesome if we had an alarm clock that puts us to sleep instantly at a certain time instead of waking us up.
Being an adult is eating the crust not because you like it, but because you paid for it.
Xyuppi
Coffee keeps me busy until it’s acceptable to drink wine.
Every corpse on Everest was once an extremely motivated person.
Florida
The Beach: Where salt actually lowers your blood pressure.
ZYuppi
It's so cold, tonight I got a $5 foot long from subway, but by the time I got back to my car it was only 6 inches...