Well, I just finished the internet. What a great read... I hope they make another one.
I'm going to buy a bunch of hermit crabs and make them live together, so when people say "are those hermit crabs?" I can say "not any more, they're mingling crabs"
Have you heard about the dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac? laid awake all night wondering if there really is a dog!
If I ever write a suicide note, I’m going to start it off with “As of today, I am officially announcing my resignation…”
Cyberbilly
Can you buy an entire chess set at a pawn shop?
My elf on the shelf went pee on the tree.
Cyberbilly
Experience is a cruel teacher. It gives a test before presenting the lesson.