Tom
A cop comes up to a man on the street. Cop: Seen anything unusual? Man: A dolphin with a hat once. Cop: I mean around here. Man: No, they live in water.
The risk I took was calculated, but MAN am I bad at math.
Xyuppi
The bouncer from my local nightclub calls me Macauley Culkin because I always go home alone.
Xyuppi
Alcohol and calculus don't mix. Never drink and derive.
Elevator music is just awful on every level.
A friend is typing..........A friend is typing.........A friend is typing..........A friend is typing..........A friend is typing.......A friend is typing.........A friend is typing........A friend is typing...........A friend is typing......... Hey!
Xyuppi
Today's Horoscope: You're gullible.