WTF Statuses

"Lmao" - a French cat
How do you spot a blind man at a nude beach? It's not hard.
I just want to read, have a snack, then take a nap. Basically, I just want to be in kindergarten again.
I should never have climbed into this vat of curdled milk. I'm in whey over my head.
You lost your phone and it's on silent? Too bad. If you liked it then you should've put a ring on it.
I just quit my job at the helium bottling plant. I refuse to be spoken to in that tone!
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Xyuppi
Nothing shuts my pie hole more than an actual pie.
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