Florida
It's true, alcohol kills people, but how many are born because of it?
Florida
I answered a telephone call yesterday but the person at the other end just kept on sneezing. I just hate cold callers.
Xyuppi
I'm convinced that every time a sock goes missing from the dryer, it comes back as an extra tupperware lid.
Xyuppi
My friend is a magician, she can turn anything into an argument.
Every time I eat Chinese I feel like I weigh won ton.
I say ” I shouldn’t be telling you this,” at the beginning of every conversation so people will listen to what I’m saying.
Florida
My friend wants to meet someone the old fashioned way, so I'm considering offering 2 cows and some fine china to a man she doesn't know if he agreed to take care of her.