WTF Statuses

#11218
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Novell
I’m in no shape to exercise.
#11219
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Novell
You can call someone who makes prosthetics a professional body builder
#11220
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Cris
My girlfriend said she's ready to walk down the aisle. So I sent her grocery shopping.
#11221
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Cris
If you fill a Whoopee cushion with gravy it adds a great new twist to a classic practical joke.
#11222
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Cris
Every time I get an eyelash in my eye, I'm reminded of how quickly I would die in the wild
#11223
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Cris
I simply do not understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon.
The first thing my wife did was to get me to put the toilet seat down. In retrospect, I really don't know why I was carrying it around with me in the first place. . .
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