If people in horror movies listened to me, they'd still be alive.
I don’t want to be a millionaire, I just want enough money to be able to stare off into the distance while pumping gas.
Anybody who goes to bed the same day they got up is a quitter.
Facebook is like a nude beach. Everybody lets everything hang out, and you really don't want to see a lot of it...
Amigo
Dang Auto correct! This is why I have crust issues!
Amigo
Parenting tip: if you beat one child with the other child you can tell people they were just fighting.... You're welcome.
Amigo
I've heard a few women mention that they love to get gifts from men that take their breath away...I'm thinking treadmill