Xyuppi
Does anyone want a pack of dead batteries? They're free of charge!
When Vanna White dies her family will receive a lot of touching letters.
They only call them yoga pants because watch netflix instant and eat leftovers pants was too long
To prepare her for real life I make my daughter pretend to tweet on a toy phone when she's taking a crap.
The worst fate I can wish upon my enemies is that they get a sudden bout of diarrhea while on stilts.
If I had a dollar for every time my dad questioned my sexuality, I could afford an island, and a fabulous collection of designer handbags.
Trust me, don't play Twister with someone who has a prosthetic leg, you'll never win.