All Asians look the same. They look using their eyes, you racist jerk.
Instead of throwing the first pitch, it'd be fun if Presidents had to quarterback the first play of a football game.
If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money, I'd just laugh and search with them.
I am 25, but, when I am called "sir," I always interpret it as an acknowledgement of British nobility. To which I always respond "Thank you, peasant."
"I just saw the coolest thing on Pinterest!!" - said no man EVER
Dottie Mabry
When in the presence of greatness, I am inspired to the heights of my mediocrity.
One day I saw this little girl near a volcano, talking to a monkey while dancing...so I called social service's on Dora's mom and dad...