WTF Statuses

If good things come to those who wait isn't procrastination a virtue?
Living with a toddler is like using a blender with no lid.
It's only a matter of time until Facebook adds “friend-zoned” as a relationship status.
Midwife - People helping people get people out of people.
I really need to stop saying, "how stupid can you be?" People are taking it as a challenge..
Lord Voldemort's nose was longer than Kim Kardashian's marriage.
If you ever google "Gary Oldman" for Pete's sake don't forget the "R"
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