I don't answer unexpected knocks on the door in case it's the beginning of a very polite Zombie Apocalypse.
If I worked at a pizza place I would use pepperoni to spell out "Marry me?" on pizzas all the time just to make things awkward for couples.
If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears it, a hipster will buy the soundtrack.
That's weird. I just bought the "Best of Limp Bizkit" CD and it's blank.
I think guys that wear Speedos should have to wear the bikini top too.
Girls are like trees, they hate axe.
My life coach advised me to run out the clock.