I fear that the next time we will see this level of cooperation in Congress, there will be a giant asteroid involved.
#I #wish #I #knew #how #to #hashtag #correctly
If you ask me, "sliced bread" is a pretty low bar for greatness.
Who named Trojan condoms? The Trojan Horse entered through the city gates, broke open, and loads of little guys came out and messed up everyone's day.
Thanks to pot, every picture I've taken with my photographic memory is blurry and out of focus.
Every year, the day before my wedding anniversary, I celebrate the anniversary of when I was last right about anything.
Ladies, do you like the strong, silent type? Then you'll love my farts.