WTF Statuses

A shark eating a human because it thought it was a seal is the equivalent of a human eating a raisin cookie thinking it was chocolate chip.
I'm just so fortunate to be going broke during a time when the saying "Money can't buy you happiness" is in style!
It's not too late to start convincing our children that the world really did end in 2012 and we're the survivors.
I have a lot on my plate right now. Not busy, just hungry.
You can't lick any part of your reflection except your tongue.
Saying "think outside the box" is a pretty inside the box suggestion.
"Dont make me regret this!" is something I say to myself every time I accept a facebook friendship from a relative.
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