Every time I eat Chinese I feel like I weigh won ton.
I say ” I shouldn’t be telling you this,” at the beginning of every conversation so people will listen to what I’m saying.
Florida
My friend wants to meet someone the old fashioned way, so I'm considering offering 2 cows and some fine china to a man she doesn't know if he agreed to take care of her.
Florida
Cops are allowed to tell women they have the right to remain silent, but when I do it I wind up with a fork in my leg.
Despite the old saying, "Don't take your troubles to bed," many women still sleep with their husbands.
The entire purpose of a bayonet is to bring a knife to a gun fight.
If I owned a copy store I would only hire identical twins.