Still no electricity. Starting to panic. Just ate the cat.
I would enjoy Superman so much more if he flapped his arms when he flew.
I bet blind people don't skydive because it would scare the shit out of their dog.
I understand the beautiful part, Cover Girl. But isn't "easy breezy" just another way to say "slutty and flatulent?"
I'm more confused than a homeless person on house arrest.
I just saw a man eating shark. He was right next to a woman eating shrimp.
I just realized that <3 is supposedly a heart. Dunno how I feel about that...I kind of enjoyed reading it as "clown penis," or "ass hat."