Insightful Statuses

You can't win a marathon without wearing Band-Aids on your nipples.
My Gmail is impenetrable to hackers in China because my password is just eight letter L's.
If you teach sex ed, it's good to tell kids the feelings they're having are normal, but funnier to single one out and mouth "Except yours."
If tried, I hope Weiner gets a stiff sentence.
Sex is a sensation caused by temptation when a man sticks his location inside a woman's destination to increase the population for the next generation do you understand my explanation or do you need a demonstration?
Today sucks more than a tyrannosaurus fielding ground balls.
Crowd surfing makes crop dusting even more enjoyable and effective.
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